As I get farther along in this pregnancy, it's becoming so normal that I struggle to keep things up to date.
For me personally, this is the most incredible, life-changing, wonderful thing that has ever (and will ever) happen to me. My little girls have become my world. Not a moment goes by that they're not on my mind in one way or another. However, as I experience all the amazingness of twin pregnancy, I forget to record things: write them, blog them, photograph them. I haven't taken an updated belly shot in WEEKS!
I would like to commit myself to every Sunday. I want to be a resource for other twin mamas (and mamas in general) in case others happen upon this blog, and I want to keep all of my friends and loved ones in the know.
I'm not saying this as a promise that I'll write every Sunday... but hopefully by giving some written affirmation here I'll commit. I especially want to keep track of how life is different once the girls are here!
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As far as twin pregnancies go (and probably as far as any pregnancy goes!), this has been a fairly uneventful journey. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for it, but I also find myself wondering, when do the bad parts of this pregnancy thing come?
When I first found out my little angel was angelS, I was overwhelmed with fear. Excitement, too, but mostly fear. I had heard bits and pieces about twin pregnancies-- and most of what I heard was how high-risk and dangerous twin pregnancies are.
We left our first ultrasound overwhelmed and excited, but my mama radar was going crazy with "this is scary. This is going to be hard. How is this going to affect work? Am I going to have premies?" Things I had never considered my baby going through flooded through me-- and it was times 2! Of course I was excited. Of course I was overwhelmed with joy on top of the fear. But part of me knew this pregnancy was going to be terribly hard.
And now, here I sit, thirty weeks in, taking a nice warm (because I'm not allowed to take "hot" until after these girls are out!) bath, writing about what a breeze this all has been, the scent of lavender and chamomile flooding my nose and the soft luxurious feeling of epsom salts calming my sore muscles.
I've come to the conclusion that the negatives of pregnancy, those regular aches and pains, those normal gripes and rants and raves, are really nothing if you make them nothing. [Disclaimer: I'm not speaking of any complications... just those normal pregnancy gripes that you always hear about: sore, tired, swollen feet, headaches, queasiness, etc.]
Some things that I have experienced (and pretty severely on some of them):
Soreness. This is one of those things I'd say I've experienced in a "severe" way. Some days it's hard to move. The pressure on my hips, the spreading of my pelvis, the tightness in my muscles... at some points, it's almost unbearable. But here's the thing-- I'm in control of all that. Some days, I take care of myself with an awesome prenatal yoga video I found on Youtube. Those nights I sleep soundly, and the next day I'm rejuvenated and have virtually no soreness. I also started seeing a chiropractor, who told me my hips and pelvis were slightly out of alignment. I now see him twice a week, and that helps with a lot of the soreness. More on him later, though.
Exhaustion. Let's be real. I work full time as a middle school teacher. Pregnant or not, I start my day tired and end my day tired. Of course, this pregnancy has done nothing to help that. Eight hours of sleep used to be more than enough. Now, eight hours gives me just enough to wish that I could sleep longer. Some days are bad. Just like with the soreness, there are some days where the tiredness is almost unbearable-- where I'm not sure if I can continue with the next class period let alone the rest of the day. But you know what? It's really not that bad. It could be-- if I made it that way. But I don't. I realize that I could be much worse off, and I'm grateful that being a little sore and a little tired is all I'm dealing with.
Swelling. Of all the things I'm handling in this pregnancy, the hardest is to deal with is the swelling. I drink a ton of water (gallons, maybe) a day, and I stay very active (I'm a teacher, remember?) but my body still goes on retaining water. My shoe size is up a size and a half, and even those size 8's, which I've never been in before, are hard to velcro some mornings. It gets to the point sometimes where I can't even wiggle my toes. They're so swollen that they just won't move. At the end of the day, I soak them, put them above my heart if I can, and let them just be.
Looking at my list, I almost feel guilty complaining. Yet I see so many mamas, singletons and multiples, who do nothing but that: complain. "I want these babies out. I want my body back." Some of them have a right to complain: some of them are going through some serious business. But for those who are experiencing just a little more or a little less than what I mentioned above... just calm down, be happy that you're pregnant, enjoy the time you've got with them. It will be over soon, and then you'll miss them wiggling around and being safe and warm in your belly. I already miss mine being there, and they're not going to be out for 6 or 8 more weeks!
Yes, I want my body back. I can't wait to go for a jog, to walk up stairs at a normal pace without getting winded. I can't wait to be able to sit up on my own and take a full breath in without babies being pressed against my lungs. But I'm in no hurry. Yes I'm tired. Of course I'm sore. No, I don't know where my organs are and I'm excited for them to return to their normal resting places. But I want to hang on to the wonderfulness as long as I can. I love growing my girls, and I'll take the aches and pains any day just to experience them growing inside me.
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One thing I was dreading in this pregnancy was something I knew was inevitable, as I'm growing two humans inside my tiny little belly: stretch marks. I knew I was predisposed: my mama got them when she was pregnant with my brother and I (though hers went away), and I had some silver ones on my hips and behind from growing during puberty [even though I'm fit and small-framed, I am one of those "fat-bottomed girls" Queen so lovingly talks about]. My first ones of the pregnancy came on the girls-- I don't mean the twins. At first I was devastated; I even cried. Then I realized that no one would ever be seeing those, and even if they did see some marks while I wore a bikini, who cares? So at one point my boobs got huge. Whatevs. Besides that, they were the silver kind, not red. Hardly noticeable.
But I still dreaded getting them on my pretty little belly. I may have gained a lot of weight since I started teaching, but I still had an admirable tummy (even when I started to get a little squishier). I couldn't fathom being able to wear a bikini ever again if I got tummy stretch marks.
Then I got them.
And it was nothing like when I first got them on the girls. I almost felt... I don't know... relieved? Excited isn't the right word, because I wasn't jumping for joy or anything. I think PROUD is the right word. I always thought that saying "they aren't ugly... you're a tiger who's earned her stripes" was so STUPID! But that's kind of how I felt. Maybe it's because I was tired of being told I was "small" for twins. I don't know. But I feel kind of proud to have those squiggly silver lines on the bottom half of my belly. Grow girls, grow!
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As far as the twins themselves go, our most recent check-up/ultrasound at 28 weeks showed very positive things. Rain weighed 2 lbs 10 oz, and Rogue was 2 lbs 11 oz. Perfect growth and right on track with each other. And perfectly on track with where a singleton baby would be. Except I have two. So for those of you who said "oh, your babies must be small." NOPE. They're perfectly normal, thanks :)
I met with the doctor at 30 weeks and she said I was a "boring patient" but that's a good thing! I never give her anything to do because the twinsies and I are perfectly healthy :).
Even the chiropractor, Dr. Mike Long at Renaissance Chiropractic Center, said that I was above average health wise, and less stressed than most people, especially pregnant moms. That was a pleasant surprise for me.
I started seeing Dr. Mike after he visited our birth class at the Birthing Inn one week. He talked about how the normal pregnancy aches and pains can be alleviated with proper care and adjustment. Even newborns can be out of alignment. I started seeing him not because of aches and pains (although he helps those things!) but because he, my birth instructor, and my doctor all mentioned that chiropractic care can help encourage babies to spin into proper position. The only negative I've gotten from my doctor appointments and ultrasounds is that the babies are both still breech. Their heads are pushing up against my lungs, and it should be their feet kicking my organs.
Right now, I'm doing everything I can to get these girls to spin. Well, everything my doctor suggests/condones.
I'm really, really praying for a natural birth with these little ladies. But I'll save all that for another blog.
In fact, I realize that it's getting late for this twin mama, and I've kept you waiting this long... coming up in my next update (hopefully before next Sunday!):
-Baby shower (and suggestions for yours, maybe!)
-Maternity photos (yes, do them. You'll regret not doing them.)
-Moving (homes) while pregnant
-Tacoma Parents of Multiples (multiples clubs)
-other FUN updates!
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